waiting on the front porch

she just stood there on the front porch waiting for her will to come and get her she was packed she had a suitcase full of noble intentions she had a map and a straight face hell bent on reinvention she was learning about please and huge humilities then one day she looked around her and everything up til then was showing and she wondered how did i get here without even knowing where i was going? ~ani difranco

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Location: montreal, quebec, Canada


Tuesday, October 17, 2006

the past few days, i have been concentrating on feeding my soul.
on saturday, i went to a birthday party, which all of my best friends had come up for, from toronto and peterborough and ottawa.
we hadn't seen one another since i went home in july, and we're a huggy, kissy lot to begin with, so it was the debaucherous love fest you could expect.
there's just something about my friends that is completely and utterly magical - every single one of them. one of them is moving to india in a month; one of them showed me the new trick she's been teaching herself; there was singing, dancing to old salt-n-pepa tunes and so much laughter, i thought i would pass out.
on sunday i spent the afternoon with my boy - we had a rather successful study date, ate dinner, and cuddled a lot - and it was just beautiful, in the way that living life with your loved one is beautiful.
i've been walking around a lot in this gorgeous autumn that's happening - blue skies, warm sun, more of the leaves on the ground now than on the trees. kicking through them on the way home from school makes me feel like i'm six years old again, and i don't mind.
i'm making plans, too - to go to the art gallery tomorrow on my break from class, to start taking pictures again. i've realized that i can't just be bee-the-woman-who-goes-to-school-and-works-on-the-weekends anymore. i need to have a soul life; i need to be doing something that touches and soothes the inner core of my being. i need to make time for it, just like i need to make time to eat well and get enough sleep.
i need to keep remembering that i'm a human being, not just a human doing.
how are you being today?


Blogger Susannah said...

"i need to keep remembering that i'm a human being, not just a human doing. " this is very wise, sweet Bee. i'm trying to remember this too... and i found myself kicking through crisp orange and red leaves as i walked to see my therapist this afternoon... it felt playful and good. i love hearing about your weekend - it sounds like true soul food for you - so pleased. keep doing what you're doing, love, cos it's working :-) x

9:13 a.m.  
Blogger Cheshire Cat said...

I feel the same way, aside from the school part. I feel as if all i do is work, eat, and sleep. This is part of the reason why i'm working shorter shifts this week. so i can actually have time to do something. Hopefully this will wake me up from my zombie trance.

10:48 a.m.  
Blogger Jessie said...

oh, you're making me smile. :)

i love it that you've been feeding your soul lately...and kicking through leaves...and hanging out with friends...and study dates... it sounds good...i mean really, REALLY good. *aaah* :)

i'm "being" good also. thank you for asking. i'm sitting here, smiling, feeling alive, just went running, then ate a healthy lunch of yummy bean curd hunan style, reading your wonderful words... and now i'm going to try to write that love letter that you tagged me for. today feels like a good day for it.

luv ya bee-pea,

11:54 a.m.  
Blogger Spiky Zora Jones said...

hey bee, looks like i'm having a helluva time writing you. i'll try again. thanks sweetie for reminding me that it's okay to toss aside the yoke. i'm glad you are on your perennial quest to being grow, to ring close the things that make you happy and complete. later baby doll.

1:43 p.m.  
Blogger b/sistersshoes said...

not so good today, the illness is kicking my bootie, but I'm hanging in there, bee.

Thank you for the kind words :D

<:-) hugs to you
Darlene xxx

5:01 p.m.  
Blogger kerry said...

i love this post... i love your quest to feed your soul... i love how inspired and validated i feel to do the same starting tomorrow because of your post. so glad i found this here. i love your question at the end - it is all too true that when asked how we're doing sometimes (often) the question is regarding our "success" or "productivity" or something external. i want to start asking my friends how they are being. how it is for them in this world, not how they are for it.

8:56 p.m.  
Blogger Deb R said...

That sounds like such a wonderful weekend. And I love the ending of this post - human being, not just a human doing. Yes.

10:25 p.m.  

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